Swimming in clear blue water

by Catherine
(South Africa)

Leisha loved to swim

Swimming in clear blue water
Deep, deep
You with your eyes wide open
Floating
Diving
Laughing
Happy once more

So many months of
Confusion
Sadness
Anger
Bewilderment
Knowing
And yet not knowing
That your inner world was changing

Past recollection
Overtaking
Your every day thoughts
Your dreams
Becoming frustrations
Only half understanding
What lay ahead
And always
Always
The pain of the present

Your body
Fighting loosing battles
Collapsing
Smothering and failing you
Causing physical pain
Deep melancholy
Whilst all around you
Family and friends
Only half listening
Sometimes angered
At you fading,
Your vanishing
From their worlds

No more questions
No more possibilities
You left
In pain
But surrounded
By those who loved you

To swim at last
Letting go
Letting yourself
Enjoy once again
The freedom of self
Swimming
Swimming
In clear blue water